Braving The Wilderness: Speak Truth To Bullshit

Chapter 5: 

Speak Truth To Bullshit. Be Civil

"Someone who lies and someone who tells the truth are playing on opposite sides, so to speak, in the same game. Each responds to the facts as he understands them, although the response of one is guided by the authority of the truth, while the response of the other defies that authority and refuses to meet its demands. The bullshitter ignores these demands altogether. He does not reject the authority of the truth, as the liar does, and oppose himself to it. He pays no attention to it at all. By virtue of this, bullshit is a greater enemy of the truth than lies are."HARRY G. FRANKFURT

Bullshit:
Lying is a defiance of the truth while bullshitting is a wholesale dismissal of the truth. "If you're not with me then you're my enemy:" This is an emotional and passionate rendering of bullshit, it is a move to force people to take side. 
If other alternatives exists then that statement is factually wrong.
The ability to think past either/or situations is the foundation of critical thinking, but still it requires courage.

Civility;
It is easier to stay civil when we are combating lying than it is when we are speaking truth to bullshit.
When we are bullshitting we aren't interested in the truth as a shared starting point.
This makes arguing slippery and it makes us more susceptible to mirroring the bullshit behaviour, which is; "the truth doesn't matter, what I think matters".

Practices That Increase Effectiveness When We Have To Speak The Truth To Bullshit

1. Approach bullshitting with generosity when possible: Don't assume that people know better and they're just being malicious or mean-spirited.
- Generosity, empathy and curiosity can go a long way in our efforts to question what we're hearing and introduce fact.

2. Civility; Civility is claiming and caring for one's identity, needs and beliefs without degrading someone else's in the process. Civility is about disagreeing without disrespect. 

To know you can navigate through the wilderness on your own, to know that you can stay true to your beliefs, trust yourself and survive it, that is true belonging.
If leaders really want people to show up, speak out, take chances and innovate, we have to create cultures where people feel safe; where their belonging is not threatened by speaking out and they are supported when they make the decision to brave the wilderness, stand alone, and speak truth to the bullshit.

BRAVING (Checklist)

1. Boundaries: How do you set boundaries when you realise you're knee deep in bullshit.? what's okay in a discussion and what's not?

2. Reliability; Bullshitting is the abandonment of reliability.

3. Accountability: How do we hold ourselves and others accountable for less bullshit and more honest debate.

4. Vault; Civility honours confidentiality. Bullshit ignores truth and opens the door to violations of confidentiality.

5. Integrity; How do we stay in our integrity when confronted with bullshit, and how do we stop in the midst of our own emotional moment to say you know what, I'm not sure this conversation is productive "or " I need to learn more about this issue".

6. Nonjudgement; How do we stay out of judgement towards ourselves when the right thing to do is say, "I actually don't know much about this". Tell me what you know and why it's important to you. "How do we not go into winner/loser mode and instead see an opportunity for connection when someone says to us, I don't know anything about that issue?

7. Generosity; What's the most generous assumption we can make about the people around us? what boundaries have to be in place for us to be kinder and more tolerant?

The practice of speaking truth to bullshit while being civil feels like a paradox, but both are profoundly important parts of true belonging.
When we are willing to risk venturing into the wilderness, and even becoming our own wilderness, we feel the deepest connection to our true self and to what matters the most.


#Ibelongtomyself...

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